Sunday, October 10, 2010

I am a floater.

The thing with having many groups of friends is that in the end you have no one. I make friends very easily. I am an open person. But the people I feel the closest to me wouldn’t notice if I went missing for two or three days. In my time of need there isn’t someone there who I can go to. I end up feeling alone.
As I am sitting here crying I cannot help but think how much I cherish people and how much I value them without them realizing it. It’s a one-way street apparently.
I hate feeling like this.
And now the group of friends I love the most is dispersing. Everyone going his or her own separate way and I am just left there hanging longing for what I once had.
I feel so sad. And alone.
I need a hug. A friend. A real one. Right now.

By the time anyone sees this it will be too late. It will be morning and I’ll go on pretending that I’m fine once again.

“Hi Claire! How are you?”
“Good.”

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